Let Jamaica
become a model for the world of social transformation. The immediate task of
the nation, as I see it, is to heal itself and come together for the benefit of
all.
Some believe that coming together is impossible. I, on the other hand, know
that it is possible. In fact, it is imperative for our future and the future of
the children.
The approach to “Jamaica-Coming-Together” that I am about to
suggest, comes from over thirty years of experience as a Master Life Effectiveness
Advisor and Coach. I have seen this approach successfully improve the lives of
many, bringing them closer together, thereby creating a greater feeling of
safety and trust.
With all due respect, it is my hope that this article will stimulate creative
dialogue, but more so, encourage daily actions on the part of every Jamaican
that will make “Jamaica-Coming-Together” a reality.
I am not speaking about coming together when all the problems are
solved, but coming together right now, by taking simple actions on a
daily basis to help restore some of the trust that has been lost.
It seems to me, that the true spirit of the Jamaican people
expresses itself in the lyric of Bob Marley, “One Love”. It seems strange
however, that a country with such a spiritual core has a problem coming
together.
In my work, I have found that the reason most people don’t come
together is that they are afraid too. We simply don’t trust each other. Not
really! It is not only here in Jamaica
but around the world. Let us take a step here in Jamaica to heal that trust and be a
model for other countries as well.
It’s funny how
many times I have heard the phrase “Trust me man!” in Jamaica. Is it
just a manner of speech, or is it because of a lack of trust inside that calls out
to be trusted? How can we “come-together” if we don’t trust each other?
I don’t only mean physical but emotional trust as well.
In order to feel
trust, real trust, you must feel safe. You can’t have one without the other.
Take a moment and look at your day and see how much of it is spent in a state
of safety and trust.
Do you feel
physical and emotional trust in your business transactions or with the people
you work with? Do you feel trust in your neighborhoods or in your homes with
your families? Do you feel trust with your friends and the country at large?
Do the grills that
surround your homes make you feel safe? Do the hordes of police and security
guards around you make you feel safe? Does your defensive and protective
language and behavior make you feel safe? I am not talking about surface safety
here, but the physical and emotional trust that comes from feeling truly safe.
For years I have traveled and lived in many parts of
this island and I find that fear and distrust have reached monumental
proportions. We spend much of our waking lives protecting ourselves from each
other. How can we come together if we don’t trust and feel safe?
We all want to be
safe, that is a given, but it’s not only safety from gunmen and thieves, but
from painful feelings that we inflict on each other every day as well. Let’s
face it, much of our fear and mistrust comes from being hurt by others and we
have developed ways of protecting ourselves that separate us and make us
suspicious and unable to really “come-together”. In spite of this, I
believe that most Jamaicans, as well as most human beings, want to trust each
other. We are all in the same boat.
The energy that is
bound up in this lack of trust is enormous and it is keeping us down as
individuals and as a country. Not coming together robs us of our true power.
In contrast, let
us take a look at times when we do come together and there is a temporary
feeling of trust: when we root for our Athletes for instance. That’s because we
share a common goal and everything that seems to separate us disappears. When
the team wins everybody wins. That is what it is all about.
If operating like a team brings us closer together and creates trust,
shouldn’t we be looking to make Jamaica into a team? Let’s look at what it is
to be a Team. A team is a group of individuals who have come together to
achieve their individual goals by achieving a common goal such as winning a
football match. When the team wins everyone wins, including the fans.
But how do we
create Teamwork in a country? Teamwork is the idea that we can operate as one, like
Bob Marley and many reggae artists have said. It comes from the actions we take
daily to build a feeling of connection and communication.
It is the simple
things in life that we do and don’t do on a daily basis that keep us from “coming-together”
as a team. By taking care of the little things, the bigger problems
sometimes take care of themselves.
I’ll give you some
examples of simple actions that you can take on a daily basis to build trust,
safety, and respect and stimulate coming together. When you are walking down
the street or in a building, smile and wave at strangers. This gives us a
feeling that others care enough to share good vibes.
When you are driving, allow another vehicle to
pass ahead of you. Beep your horn in respect. If someone allows you to go ahead
of them in traffic, then beep your horn to return your appreciation. Allow
three vehicles a day ahead of you. It is a simple action, but it communicates
respect and a desire to “come-together”. It could become contagious.
Don’t we talk a
lot about respect in Jamaica? Respect! Let’s see it. Open a door for someone.
Guide a senior citizen or a child across the street. Pick up a piece of garbage
and throw it into a bin. Can you imagine if each person on this island picked
up one piece of garbage a day and threw it into a bin? Buy a friend, or better
yet a stranger lunch. Give something to someone who needs it.
Do something
simple. Say thank you for anything that someone does for you. Listen to someone
you are not accustomed to listening too; your children for instance? Listen to
your employees. Listen to your constituency. Listen to your team members. “Seek
first to understand rather than seeking to be understood.”
Tell someone how
much you appreciate him or her. Don’t hold back. Tell them how much you love
them even. Call someone you have not called in a long time and share how you
have missed and love them. Call someone you have been avoiding, because of
painful feelings, and create a healing by getting your hurt feelings out in the
open. Make a big sign entitled “Jamaica-Coming-Together” or “We are all in the
Same Boat. Put it on the front door of your office or work place. I’m serious.
Write it on your buses. Put words like these in your dancehall and reggae
tunes.
Think of all the simple actions that can communicate that we are “coming-together”
as a team, that we respect each other and we care.
If you want the
country to “come together as a team” to win, you must start by
taking action today. We will support you. Get involved. This is your life and
your nation. Take responsibility for it and do something about it.
You think that
every action and every communication that you take or don’t take doesn’t affect
your life and the lives of your team members. Well wake up! It does! It is all
part of the collective power of the nation. The communications you make
every day and the actions you take at home and at work affect your team’s
ability to win. We are all in this together.
To operate as one, and be a winning team, there must be clear and
powerful channels of communication.
I challenge you as
individuals, communities, churches and companies to focus for one day on open,
honest communication from the heart. Let it flow, and let’s see what happens.
Take one little risk. Ask yourself what you are thinking and feeling and be
willing to communicate that feeling to another person you work with or with
your family, friends or church members.
It is one little
step. But “a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” For one
day focus on being real and communicating your joys and appreciation, but don’t
hold anything in. If you sense that you are holding back your feelings, let
them out and express yourself.
There are some of
you who are reading this and thinking that what I am saying is foolishness,
since there is great danger out in the world and we must be cautious. I am not
saying that you shouldn’t be cautious. I am speaking of allowing yourself to
express your true feelings, to feel your feelings, get connected to yourself
and your real power as a human being and communicate. In this way you will be
able to improve your life and contribute to yourself and your country by
“coming- together with others as a team”.
If you are
responding to these possibilities with anything but enthusiasm, ask yourself why?
Why would you not want to become a member of the Jamaican Team? It is not only
good for you, but for your company, community and your country. Why are you
holding back? Maybe there are other areas in your life in which you are holding
back as well. Why not try this approach. Nothing else has worked. Has it?
E-mail us at jamaicacomingtogether@yahoo.com
with ideas about simple actions that can be taken on an ongoing basis to
contribute to building trust. Let’s hear about your personal experiences in
expressing your feelings and taking these types of actions to build your team’s
ability to win. We will put some of your experiences in print, on the radio and
on TV to communicate to others that what is happening with
“Jamaica-Coming-Together” is working.
Even if five
percent of the population takes one action every day, there will be a shift in
the consciousness of how we see our country and ourselves. Those who don’t
participate at the beginning will soon join us as they get caught up in the
good feelings and excitement of the idea of becoming a team to win for
everyone’s benefit. Decide right here and now to be one of the first to take
action and as the Nikki commercial points out, “Just Do It”.
Friends! This is
not magic. It takes commitment. Let’s see what we can produce when we take
simple daily actions to communicate respect and our desire to come-together as
a team to win. It is all about creating an environment of trust and it is
trust that will bring us together. It is God’s will.
Onelove,
Dino DeFilippi
This article is
the personal expression of Dino DeFilippi, Master Life Effectiveness Coach, who
originates from the US, but lives, loves and is the leader of his staff of
Jamaican consultants, trainers and coaches.
Dino DeFilippi
Copyright 2007
Dino DeFilippi
Permanent Resident
of Jamaica
Chairman-CEO of
Dino DeFilippi Enterprises Limited
1 Abbeydale Road
Kingston 10,
Jamaica West Indies
Tel 876-371-4397
or 876-346-5892
